Monday 30 September 2013

Stages of Grief

 Its been a hard couple of weeks for Kenyans.

I havent been able to blog in the past week because I was still in deep denial about the Westage Mall Terrorist attack so I am dealing with the situation how I know best. 

 I picked the extract below from one of the episodes of Grey's Anatomy and it has helped me a whole lot. Those of you going about your lives but are still in denial have a read:


"When someone suffers a catastrophic loss their are five stages of grief.

1. Denial- The loss is so unthinkable we cant imagine its true.
2. We are angry with everyone, angry with survivors but most especially angry with ourselves.
3. Then we bargain, we plead, we offer everything we have and even our souls in exchange for just one more chance.
4. Then we bargaining has failed and the anger is to hard to maintain we fall hard into depression and until finally we accept what we have done and we cannot change it so we let go.
5. We let go and move into acceptance.


It isn't just death we have to grief but its life too. Its loss its change and we wonder why it sucks so much it hurts so much, why the sunken feeling at the bottom stomach just wont go away but the thing we have to remember is that we have to stay alive and when it hurts so much and we can't breath that's how we survive.


By remembering that one day we will wake up in the morning and not feel this bad about ourselves keeps us going and reminds us that we are only but human and yes we do fail.


Grief comes in its own time for everyone and in its own way so the best thing to do is to strive for honesty. For us the best we can do for ourselves since we can't control it to let it go so we cry its the only way we know how and the worst part about it is that when you think its over it starts again and it takes your breath away.


There are five stages of grief. They look different on all of us but they are always five:



 Denial

  Anger

  Bargaining

Depression

and finally

  Acceptance

God Bless Kenya!


 I decided not to dwell so much on the issue. I know it sounds insensitive but the more we dwell on the past the harder it is to start the healing process. I am going to keep doing what I do and that way the healing process shall be easier.



 It was African Sunday in Church yesterday and my mother was so proud when I walked down the stairs in this "kitenge" dress.


  I am very picky when it comes to my clothes. I think its genetic because I see it a lot  with my Aunts on my Father's side. I had this leso fabric for ages up until I meet Papi my Congolese fundi all the way in Kibera. Let me tell you the man can put together some good pieces. The fabric is bold so I just wanted a simple A-line dress with a belt to help cinch my waist en give it a ball room/Cinderella feel.


 I paired it up with red atmosphere sandals that even bring out the yellow better en my classic red purse. Ladies you either go big or go home so I went big then later I went home : )


The cornrows look lovely huh! I know I cut off the hairstyle from the Newspaper awhile ago (yes I am that girl) held on to it until now. I really dn't like the normal cornrows because I think the make my head look funny but this had some flare to it en walaah....hehehe!

'

Dress- Tailor made
Atmosphere Sandals- Miss Kerre Fashions
Red Purse- Bus Station
Chain and Earrings- Juvel kollection  
Sunnies- Gifted
Gucci Watch- Gifted
Mocha Chica!

6 comments:

  1. love the dress n shoes combination
    http://africanmbiu.blogspot.com/2013/10/hesey-designs.html

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  2. you look really nice..am stealing the hairstyle :-)

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    Replies
    1. Steal it girl..and pull it off like a diva! Thanks for dropping by doll!

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